The X-ecutioners: How to Make Soap — From Scratch!
1. Saponificate, kidRob Swift: You gotta dissolve lye in softened water in a bowl. I prefer plastic bowls, because it feels like we’re cuttin’ a record.
Roc Raida: We’re messing with lye here — no skin exposed. Put on a lab coat.
Total Eclipse: The mixture will heat up when it reacts to the oil. This is called . . .
Swift: Saponification.
2. Add essential oils
Swift: Now, go to your local supermarket and get some coconut oil and shortening, and melt it all together. Then throw in some olive oil. But not virgin, baby — you want that ho-y, prostituted-out olive oil. Then throw in any fragrances you want to use: Polo, Fahrenheit — as long as it’s some dope fragrances you’re not gonna mind.
3. Mix it up
Eclipse: Here’s where you add some color. The best color is pink, ’cause it reminds me of my girlfriend in the shower. Some people put grains in their soap. But oatmeal? Naw, none of that. Keep it regular.
4. Mold it, fold it
Eclipse: You can mold your soap any way you want. Like, the shape of a hat would be pretty cool.
Swift: Yeah, a hat would be dope — you could wear it instead of shampooing.
