Fall Out Boy: Babies, Breakups, Bromances!

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Eventually, they reconciled, but for Wentz, the incident was an eye-opener. “There are some moments where you go, Dude, I’ve spent the last 28 years of my life as a complete shit pile,” he says. “I’m not empathetic at all. People think I’m some kind of Dr. Phil problem-solver, but most of the time I couldn’t care less. Now, for the first time, I’m trying to look at things from other people’s perspective.”

Part of this newfound selflessness stems from Wentz’s impending fatherhood. He says he’s prepared—he’s read all the books—and he thinks he’ll make a pretty rad dad (or, as he puts it, a DILF): “I love my band, and I love my wife, but this is the first thing I’ve cared about too much to fuck up.” Last night he was up until 4 a.m. putting together a mini piano that he knows won’t get used for years, if at all.

Two weeks later, when 7-pound, 11-ounce Bronx Mowgli is born, he takes a break from diaper duty to check in by e-mail, sounding even more humbled: “It’s incredible. The thought that someone is dependent on me is empowering and also really fucking scary.” (Actually, he writes, “really f**n scary”: He’s “working on the f-bombs.”)

Wentz has this fantasy: “Sometimes I think Ashlee and I should do Newlyweds 2, take that fuck-you money and move to an island somewhere,” he says. “Just disappear.” So why doesn’t he? “Partly, I’d be fucking over a lot of people,” he says. “My band, people who rely on me.” But his second answer is more indicative: “I’d probably miss the lights too much.”

His BlackBerry buzzes: It’s Ashlee, and she’s hungry. “I gotta take off,” he says apologetically. “The wife is freaking out.” He orders her a goat cheese salad—extra walnuts, extra strawberries—and has the waiter box it up. We settle the bill, and Wentz stands and checks his hair in the mirror, smoothing out a few errant wisps. He walks to the door—not fast, but with purpose—and as he pushes it open, he flinches almost imperceptibly, bracing himself for the flashbulbs waiting on the other side.

Aaaaand, action on the carousel!