As the ever-expanding world of reality TV keeps finding thrilling new lows, the rest of pop culture struggles to keep up.
So with It’s Complicated, she tries to show that she’s a nice Midwestern gal, parading her toddlers in front of the cameras and using her recently widowed, apparently shell-shocked, agonizingly exploited dad, Irv, as the straight man. In one especially excellent episode, Denise goes weeping to Irv about her shrink.
Denise: Dad, he makes me feel like I’m fuckin’ crazy.
Irv: Well, you’re not crazy.
Denise: I’m starting to think I am.
Irv: No, you’re not. You’re not.
Denise: Are you sure?
Irv: [Pause.] I don’t think you are.
She is! Next cosmic riddle!
I also love how Denise’s shrink tells her she’s giving too much, and not getting enough “me time,” so she makes her girlfriends throw her a party, where a consultant shows up to explain, “A great way to express yourself is pole dancing. Have any of you ever done any pole dancing?” There’s a priceless flicker of panic on Denise’s face (What is this pole dancing of which you speak? Never heard of it!) before she gets up on the pole to explore her freshly awakening sensual side. Surprise—she’s good at it! Beginner’s luck, no doubt.
Where will this end? It won’t. That’s why Brody Jenner, stepbrother of reality star Kim Kardashian, ex-boyfriend of reality star Nicole Richie and ex-BFF of reality star Spencer Pratt, is getting his own show, because America refuses to believe there isn’t something we’re not already getting from Brody Jenner. It’s interesting how fate works, just like Ambre says on Rock of Love.
Reality stars aren’t built to last—everybody knows the pattern where some nobody like Paris or Nicole gets famous on a show, and then their off-screen party-tard antics become the thing they’re famous for, and the show can’t keep up. If anybody was in the mood to chuckle at Paris, they didn’t go to The Simple Life; they went to her daily paparazzi-flashing scandal. This year’s crop will be no exception. But as for the future, who knows—nothing on Keeping Up With the Kardashians could possibly be as funny as the fact that Kim announced her support for Obama at a launch party for Girls Gone Wild magazine. (“I had dinner with him once, and he just seemed very firm about the change, and that’s, like, his motto,” Kim told the world.) Or the fact that Michael Lohan, Lindsay’s estranged ex-con dad, recently approached Kim at a party and asked her to “keep a watchful eye” on Lindsay. Which means the fun is only beginning.