Massacre space aliens, terrorists and Coldplay songs in these blockbuster games, coming to a console near you.
SingStarSony
PS3November 13
Grab the included USB mic and sing along with the likes of Coldplay, Ne-Yo and Franz Ferdinand in this addictive karaoke game. Then plug in PS3’s EyeToy Web cam, record your best version of Britney’s “Toxic” and upload the video to My SingStar Online, where others can rate your performance. The game’s prerecorded vocals fade out as soon as you start singing, so those prone to pitchiness should be especially wary.
Target audience: Fun drunks; aspiring Sanjayas
TimeShiftSierra
Xbox 360, PS3, PCOctober 30
Messing with the space-time continuum is rarely a good idea, as anyone who suffered through the Ashton Kutcher vehicle The
Butterfly Effect can attest. But after an evil-scientist type reverses time and installs himself as dictator, it’s your duty to don a special time-traveling suit to try and reset history. You have the ability to stop or slow time — down to freezing individual raindrops in motion — while you keep going at normal speed. Beats having to buy an umbrella.
Target audience: The Fermata readers; nonlinear thinkers
Need for Speed: ProStreetEA Games
Xbox 360, PS3, WiiOctober 31
Get behind the wheel of one of this game’s highly customizable cars, then race it to earn enough cash for an even sweeter ride. Unlike the zillion other
Need for Speed games, this version makes the racing nice and legal — meaning there’s no need to watch out for the fuzz. But, in a series first, you can actually wreck your car, reducing it to a smoking heap of metal. Billy Joel might want to stay away from this one.
Target audience: Folks bummed that Pimp My Ride got canceled
Gears of WarMicrosoft
PCEarly November
In this PC version of the massive Xbox 360 hit, you once again play a tough-as-nails Marine who does battle against giant bug creatures. The PC version boasts improved graphics and a handful of new levels; plus, playing with a mouse and keyboard allows far more precise aiming. Log on to Microsoft’s Games for Windows-Live service to fight the insects with a team of your pals. Or actually take care of the roach infestation in your real-life apartment, slob.
Target audience: Anyone who’s ever burned an ant with a magnifying glass
Call of Duty 4: Modern WafareActivision
Xbox 360, PS3, PCNovember 5
The
Call of Duty WWII shooter franchise time-travels to the present-day Middle East, where our boys in uniform must take out terrorists, insurgents and other enemies of freedom. Besides the urban combat the series is famous for, the new
Call of Duty boasts 12-person multiplayer capabilities for all three platforms. And, unlike our current situation in Iraq, when a mission goes wrong, you can always reload and try again.
Target audience: Donald Rumsfeld; conflicted peaceniks
Super Mario GalaxyNintendo
WiiNovember 12The world’s most iconic plumber takes to the stars in an attempt to (once again) rescue his not-exactly-street-smart girlfriend, Princess Peach, from the clutches of evil. Use the Wii remote and its nunchuck attachment to steer Mario from planet to planet, fighting new and classic Nintendo villains and collecting stars along the way. New power-ups—like a bee suit, which gives Mario the ability to fly—will trip out legions of Nintendo fanboys.
Target audience: Proud Italian-Americans; hallucinogen users
Assassin’s CreedUbiSoft
Xbox 360, PS3, PCNovember 13
In this stealth/action game set during the Third Crusade, you play the hooded assassin Altair, who must leap tall buildings and blend in to crowds in historically accurate versions of Jerusalem, Damascus and Acre to off a who’s who of the year 1191. Altair, who can crawl up buildings with Spider-Man–like dexterity, also harbors a deep, dark secret, which is slowly unveiled during the game. We can hardly stand the suspense!
Target audience: Middle East History for Dummies readers
CrysisEA Games
PCNovember 16
You play a lone soldier—cloaked in experimental, Army-issued nano-armor—who battles North Koreans and space aliens. Who dreams up this crap? Who cares! You won’t even give the plot a second thought once you get a load of the game play:
Crysis features some of the most advanced in-game physics and graphics ever seen. (You can even shoot individual branches off trees.) Unfortunately, playing it will take a computer rig that costs as much as a decent used car.
Target audience: High-end PC owners; Kim Jong Il haters
Mass EffectMicrosoft
Xbox 360November 20
The year is 2183 and humans have joined forces with aliens to stop a superpowered bad guy named Saren who’s intent on killing off all sentient beings.
Mass Effect is a role-playing game, but unlike other titles in that genre, it ditches the boring turn-based combat for fast-paced shooting. There’s also a dialogue interface with multiple choices for every conversation you have, which allows players to take the moral high ground or act like total intergalactic douche bags.
Target audience: Sci Fi channel addicts
Uncharted: Drake’s FortuneSony
PS3November 20
Nathan Drake, a fortune hunter with Abercrombie-model looks, sets off in this cinematic action-adventure game looking for a treasure hidden by his great-great-grandfather (the one and only Sir Francis Drake) on a Pacific island. As Drake, you’ll be forced to kill lots of pesky mercenaries who’d rather you not get your hands on the booty. Also, there are puzzles to solve—hey, life’s not all about killing mercenaries.
Target audience: National Treasure fans; lonely housewives